Today is the time I bid farewell to my little Wealthy after being at my house comfortably for 3 months...he with me say long period not really long period, say short period not really short period. When I just start to adapt him with me, having his accompany all the time and just in a sudden he has to leave me and go on to another family already. I sort of don't get used to it because normally at night when I went out to pray he will just follow behind me to wherever I go but today he no longer behind me and I sort of miss him already...But somehow or rather I wish him well and healthy at the new family that going to love and like him.... Going to miss my little Wealthy...
I really got no idea why my life is so bad recently and I know that it is very bad to complain life is not fair...BUT sometimes I am getting really bored with it adi and I need some space for me to grumble a little bit. I do hope that in times of nerve-wracking I can stil hang on and stay on the track...GOD please do give me some strength to continue walking down this road. This road is getting so narrow that I can't see any lights already...do light me up and show me through it...WHAT A LIFE!
So now I shall reveal a little close up about my class gathering which happen on the 14 of May. It is sort of a late post because I just only get some pictures from my friend so that is why a little late for me to upload and say it out here. That day was a great night because beside having fun there we also celebrated the MAY babies...3 of them; Ming Suan, Shiek Ching and Benny and absolutely not to forget too is to bid farewell to our bro; Kian Tiong who is now in UTAR, Kampar to further up his studies. This is not a normal class gathering I might say because not many people attended, only few of us only.
all of us but without derrick that has went back early for that night..
Then, our chaotic night begin with searching birthday candles around in Pulau Gadong, Malim and finally end up our treasure hunt for candles in Taman Merdeka. 4 of us, like crazy people driving and searching for candles in 7-Eleven shop at Pulau Gadong where ended up the person in the shop showing us the BIG WHITE candles which people use to pray or light up when there is no electricity. I got stammered the moment she shows me that candles...haha..then we all the way looking and searching around for bakery shop but to our surprises there is no bakery shop at all. Then we stop at THE COWBOY supermarket. So called supermarket but inside seems like dun have a sight of candles at all. We then seek help from the person there, then they point us here and there but end up DON'T HAVE AT ALL. Really a waste of time. Then we straight head on to Taman Merdeka because I knew that there got a lot of bakery shops so no need to worry. Finally, come to an end of our time searching and hunting for candles..haha...the bakery shop got all we need. Then when we tell the baker there we want 40 small candles, the uncle there got a shock and ask again "you all want 40 candles arh?"...then without longer hestitation we answer YES, uncle...40 ya...So here comes our 40 candles for the cake.
the cake that has been destroyed by 40 candles..
the MAY babies; from left Ming Suan, Shiek Ching and Benny..
After we get the stuff that we want we head on to Pantai Kundur there to meet up with the rest of them. We get all the food and tools ready while the guys patiently making the fire pit. We girls just do our stuff like taking pictures all the time..haha.. Then when it was ready to barbeque, all of us trying to find a great place to place our butt and start grilling the chicken and eat it up. Really a lof of food on that night, and most of it unfinished. Plenty left more in the ice box. When we almost finish eating, the NIGHT begins with some nastic people throwing sands and start catching people to throw into the sea..haha..I was not the excluding one who got wet either. Some of my BEST friends, push me into the sea and here I am for that night becoming a WET CHICKEN..haha..The worst part is we can just jump into the sea without thinking further that we DID NOT bring any extra clothes to change and towel to wipe. Just without thinking, we just play and have fun with it. The too daring people to do stuff when things are not meant to be that way..haha..
getting ready with the fire pit..
and after that it become like this..
night will not be perfect without my favourite fruit, COCONUT..
And the rest of it, I'll let the pictures do the talking because I am too lazy to elaborate more on
that night. SO conclusion, it was an enjoyable night.
the crazy bunch of people..
the ladies of the night..
from left: lee yen, kian tiong, me and benny..
kai yin and me..the faithful one..
all the wet chickens...
the crazy bunch of people...
from left: ming suan, me, kian tiong, lee yen and kai yin..
poor lee yen...
no idea what is this 3 person up too..
me and shiek ching...
all the "ultrawomen" - LAME pose..
kian tiong trying to show his ass off...
and this is Kok Keong turns to be our next victim..
from left: shiek ching, me, kian tiong and kai yin
Most people are telling me, you must enjoy your life to the fullest. Don’t ever miss the chance to enjoy and have fun. And now I can proudly say that I do “ENJOY” my life to the fullest.
Riding away with roller coaster my life is definitely filled with ups and down. Not to leave behind too my life is challenging enough for a 20 years old girl like me to go on the track and distance. If I were given a chance I prefer not to have this challenging life at all. This journey is not that nice to be walk on anymore. I am getting sick and tired of it already. I do not know when will it end but I do hope that it will end soon.
Many of people too, especially my friends who keep giving me endless support for me to walk down this road. They keep telling me that don’t worry, everything will be alright and the sun will still shine for you. All I can do is, wait for that day to arrive and cross my fingers to hope that everything went on smoothly. I do hope that, the next moment I woke up from sleep, I am free of worries and absolutely the SUN SHINES for ME! At certain moment of times, the imprudent of me will always wonder around and dreaming away that I HAVE A RICH boyfriend…well, I must be crazy enough already~
At this inflexibility of times also, I realize that I am not alone actually. There are many of my friends who are around me and lending me a helping hand. Their kindness help is something that I wouldn’t be able to repay. I truly appreciate them as friends. No words can express how I actually want to thank them. They save me up when I drop into the muddy pool and show me the darkness out from that road. Once again, I sincerely thank them…even some are not reading my blog but I still want to thank them.
For this particular week, I have been very lethargic and do not know what to do. Time lead me to no where and some times I was wondering where am I? And then it comes to these wee hours I actually have something caught in my mind. Most people are already in their dream land or snoozing all the way but where I am again, down here blogging some “nonsensical” stuff I suppose…
To All My Dearsss, I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting in the yard and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I'm spending more time marveling around and less time to use for the right things.
Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experiences to savor, not to endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them.
"Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now without wasting more time or else I will be regretting it for the rest of my life.
I'm not sure what others would've done had they known they wouldn't be here for the tomorrow that we all take for granted. I think they would have called family members and a few close friends. They might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think they would have gone out for a Chinese dinner or for whatever their favorite food was.
I'm guessing; I'll never know.
It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew my hours were limited. Angry because I hadn't written or utter certain letters or words that I intended to write and say one of these days. Not to leave behind too, angry and sorry that I didn't tell my parents and my friends often enough how much I truly love them. I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, tell myself that it is special.
Every day, every minute, every breath truly is a gift from God.
"People say true friends must always hold hands, but true friends don't need to hold hands because they know the other hand will always be there."
Yours truly, ~ ME ~
That all for now…pretty late now and is time for me to leave here and jump to my bed for the dream land catch up.
The last few weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions for me.
I'm sad, I'm angry, I'm happy, I'm anxious and many more others emotions that lies in me.
At the end of the day, I'm physically and mentally exhausted from the whirling dervish that seems to have taken over my head.
Why do we have emotions? Wouldn't it better to have the heart and soul of a lizard and feel nothing at all?
It's easy to understand why we have good emotions. Happy people live happy lives and make for happy mates. Presumably, all that happiness translates into passing on genes. When you are happy, you will be in seven wonders of heaven and not knowing what lies ahead of you. Some people are those happy-go-lucky types with to them problems and sadness is just not a big deal. They take things easily and live their live happily too.
I can’t actually recall how many times I actually have my happy face on. I also can’t recall when is the time when I really happy and the happy are not acted out. Happiness comes but it doesn’t last. It may appear to you in 1 second or 1 minute but the next second or minute you will again felt that you are in negative emotions back.
Harder to explain are the "bad" emotions such as fear, anxiety, anger and hate. Why would evolution fill our heads with such negativity?
When I can’t recall my happiness but I can call all my “bad” emotions. For the past few weeks, nothing actually gives me the ecstatic joy feelings except when I celebrated my birthday. Apart from that, I don’t reminiscence any of it already. My fear is I was totally trepidation that I couldn’t get a place or better word secures me a place in local university. I was anger on some annoying people who care too much on other people businesses. I was sad due to some problems I am facing but I hope everything will come to an end soon. But in such tragic situation, I never failed to have friends who are with me most of the times and even lend me a helping hand when I need the most. So, I thank them sincerely.
It may be that emotionality comes as an all-inclusive package and so you have to take the good with the bad; with love comes its evil twin hate, with happiness comes the flip side of sadness. Fact is, without these complex social emotions that involve others; we'd be stuck back in the forest, living alone in the trees.
But the good point is that all emotions are "good," at least in the evolutionary sense. They are there to help us, and they bring hope. Even in the depth of sadness, we always know that the opposite feeling of happiness might bubble up.
And how would we recognize the happy part without experiencing the sad part?